Friday 22 June 2012

Sinister Nursery Rhymes

As children, we all heard nursery rhymes. "Jack and Jill", "Mary Mary Quite Contrary", and "Humpty Dumpty" were all a part of our childhoods. 
However, few people actually know the meaning behind some of these sweet sounding little rhymes. A whole bunch of them are kinda creepy...

1. Ding Dong Bell
Ding dong bell
Pussy's in the well
Who put her in?
Little Johnny Flynn
Who pulled her out?
Little Tommy Stout
What a naughty boy was that
Try to drown poor Pussycat,
Who ne'er did any harm
But killed all the mice
In the Farmer's barn!

This little ditty was used to teach small children a moral lesson. Originally, the rhyme left the poor cat to drown but it was later changed to the cat being saved. This rhyme was to teach children that it was cruel to harm animals who never hurt them. 

2. Goosey Goosey Gander
Goosey gooset gander where shall I wonder,
Upstairs, downstairs and in my lady's chamber
Then I met an old man who wouldn't say his prayers
I took him by the left leg and threw him down the stairs.

It's believed that this nursery rhyme dates back to 16th century England and refers to the persecution of Catholics by the Protestants. Catholic priests were often forced into hiding to avoid being killed for their faith. If caught hiding Catholics, whole families were at risk of being executed along with them. The rhyme implies that if you don't say your prayers properly, something unpleasant would happen. Back then, Catholic prayers were in Latin.

3. Humpty Dumpty
Humpty dumpty sat on a wall, 
Humpty dumpty had a great fall;
All the king's horses, and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again!

It's thought that "Humpty Dumpty" was a cannon. It was used during the English Civil War from 1642 to 1649. The town of Colchester was protected by this huge wall, adjacent to which was Saint Mary's Church. The town was attacked by the Parlimentarians, and in response to this, the Royalists mounted a cannon on the roof of Saint Mary's Church. But, unfortunately for the Royalists, the wall to their fort was blown up and the cannon was destroyed. This forced them to surrender to the Parlimentarians.

4. Jack and Jill
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down and broke his crown
And Jill came tumbling after.
Up got Jack, and home did trot
As fast as he could caper
He went to bed and bound his head
With vinegar and brown paper

This rhyme's origins can be found in France during the French Revolution. It is believed that Jack and Jill are King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette. It refers to the fact that the king was killed first and that the queen was executed shortly after. Since it's a pretty grim story behind the rhyme, they gave it a happy ending so they wouldn't freak the kiddies out.

5. Mary Mary Quite Contrary
Mary Mary quite contrary,
How does your garden grow?
With silver bells and cockle shells
And pretty maids all in a row.

This one is my favourite and it's probably the most sinister one that I've read about. It's about "Bloody Mary", the daughter of King Henry VIII. Queen Mary was a hard core Catholic and executed Protestants in droves. Her "gardens" were the graveyards that she buried people in. The "silver bells and cockle shells" are believed to be instruments of torture.    

Kinda puts things in a different light when you hear about the meaning behind some of these things, right? Not quite as sweet and innocent as we'd first thought. If you want to check out the meanings for some other nursery rhymes, you can check them out here.

Tuesday 19 June 2012

Oh, the Horror: an update

Well, it looks like "crazy" paid off.
That's right, my friends.
I'M GOING TO SEE LADY GAGA IN NOVEMBER!!!
That is all.

Feeling pretty smug right about now.

Oh, the Horror!

I am in all kinds of mental anguish peeps. Seriously, I can think of no worse kind of torture.
I should be be giddy, floating and sleeping in. Am I doing any of these things?
No.
I woke up at 6:30 so that I would be ready to pounce on Lady Gaga concert tickets. Yes, My idol, my hero, the Mother Monster is coming to South Africa in November.
And I have been waiting at computicket's website for going on 2 hours now. I am a mess. I honestly can't think of anything more stressful than sitting in front of my computer mentally willing the number of people ahead of me to change from "more than 1000" to "less than 1000".
I acknowledge that this is beyond pathetic. Possibly even unhealthy. Hell, I haven't even had breakfast. I'm running on Red Bull and coffee to keep from falling asleep at the computer. 
But I don't care. And if I don't get the tickets today I will camp out in front of a comuticket on Thursday morning and wait until they open. 
I NEED TO SEE GAGA.
Please don't judge me.

   

Wednesday 13 June 2012

Crikey Moses It's Cold!

Okay, so before you whip out your Captain Obvious bullets and load them into the gun you fondly refer to as No Shit, I know that since it's winter it's supposed to be cold. But I think that it's a fact that bears repeating. 
I hate winter. I cannot function. I'm like a really old, rusty car that won't start when it's cold. And when it does start, it clanks and groans. I can't even get enthusiastic about my birthday (it's tomorrow. I'm going to be 21).  
But I'm going to try and cheer and warm myself up. I remember watching an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer where Willow and Buffy were playing a game called "anywhere but here" (I think that's what it's called). That's what I'm going to do now. I'm going somewhere warm and with lots of history.
I'm going to... Vienna.
Just putting some pictures of the places I'd like to see.

I have looked all over the damn place but I don't know what the heck this place is called.
Sorry
Vienna Karlskirche


Schonbrunn Palace

Vienna Opera House

Pretty, isn't it? So, that's where I am today. I'm basking in the sun in front of Schonbrunn Palace and later tonight I'm going to the opera.

Thursday 7 June 2012

TTFN again

It's exam time and this means that I'm going to be a bit scarce until 18 June. Not such a long time but also forever. 
So, I'll speak to you all soon. If anybody is writing test or exams, I wish you luck. For those lucky bastards who aren't writing, I'm jealous.
Toodles! 

Friday 1 June 2012

Don't Believe the Hype

I watched Snow White and the Huntsman today. I won't lie.  I was a teeny bit disappointed. The action and visuals and stuff were amazing. 
But there was one huge glaring problem for me: Kirsten Stewart.
What. The. Hell.
I won't dispute that she is a very pretty girl. But I don't recall ever watching someone quite so... wooden. I honestly believe that she was at her most convincing when she was playing dead. No emotion, no animation, nothing. At one point my friend and I were laughing at her, which I'm pretty sure is not what the director was going for. It felt like she was just saying the words but there was no feeling behind it. Her performance was better than it was in Twilight but I don't think that's saying much. Honestly, I'm pretty sure there were loads of other pretty dark haired actresses who could have played that role a hundred times better than KStew.
Rant over.
But on the plus side, Charlize Theron was beyond amazing. She was beautiful when she had to be beautiful. She was crazy when she had to be crazy. She was scary as hell when she had to be scary. I was kinda rooting for the queen at one point, to be perfectly honest.And then, last but not least, Chris Hemsworth.
Oh my stars, is that man not the most beautiful creature you've ever seen? That accent was enough to make my legs turn to jelly.An entirely shallow complaint about SWATH was that Hemsworth wasn't shirtless enough. I will watch this movie again just to get another eyeful of that man.

Sorry, couldn't resist


Perv over.
I liked the action and the special effects were pretty cool. But I felt that there wasn't enough dialogue between the main characters. Like how was the Huntsman (I don't know if they ever gave us this poor sexy man's name?) supposed to fall in love with Snow White when they hardly ever spoke?!
Maybe I'm overanalysing. It was a fun movie but it felt kinda lacking in a lot of ways.